Confessions of the Day: Parents on Reddit Are Sharing Dark Secrets They'll Never Tell Their Kids

Mom, Dad—are you on Reddit? Parents on the site were given this question: What is one shocking secret your kids will never learn about you? And then they spilled the beans...

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  • 01

    EW, YOU GUYS.

    Shoulder - -1 britt5689 604 points 18 hours ago That daddy and I don't go to "dinner parties" we hit up swing clubbs. permalink save report give gold reply
    via Reddit
  • 02

    I thought SteveFish looked different.

    Fish - (- tn notahick 657 points 18 hours ago We had a goldfish named SteveFish. Well, we had 3 of them over the course of 10 years. My youngest son thinks it was only one. permalink save report glve gold reply
    via Reddit
  • 03

    Huh? This is wrong and confusing on so many levels.

    Hair - [- cruz_alfy 235 points 1 day ago That my wife is actually my son's sister. permalink save report give gold reply
    via Reddit
  • 04

    You said you only smoked weed once!

    Graphic design - (- AdopsDude 1746 points 22 hours ago That I've done more hallucinogens than he or his friends could ever dream of doing. I used to love LSD. permalink save report glve gold reply
    via Reddit
  • 05

    Little harsh, Dad.

    Face - - Tequilacowboy 939 points 1 day ago That I didn't want any of them and can't wait to divorce their mother. permallink save report glve gold reply
    via Reddit
  • 06

    These lies cut too deep.

    Lawn - (- Dravendk 2316 points 1 day ago I ran over my daughters favorite stuffed toy, with my lawnmower. But i told her that the neighbors dog stole it. permallink save report give gold reply
    via Reddit
  • 07

    Maybe that's why I'm a gamer?

    Animated cartoon - - arlablackfire 241 points 22 hours ago Let's just say that Valentine's Day we decided to play Mario Kart 8 drinking games. And next month we're having a baby permallink save parent report glve gold reply
    via Reddit
  • 08

    DAD, G R O S S.

    Organism - - Leproscro 1468 points 21 hours ago I used my son's microscope to look at my own sperm. Yep...I jizzed on my kids toy....on purpose. permalink save report give gold reply
    via Reddit
  • 09

    Slowly realizing all parents are insane.

    Facial expression - actioncheese 470 points 18 hours ago That one of my sons was conceived while a random guy watched on Skype.. permalink save report give gold reply
    via Reddit
  • 10

    Um...so who's my dad?

    Male - [- GrouchyGreta 2867 points 22 hours ago That she was conceived during a threesome.
    via Reddit

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